Tings I learned from the Grammys

Spies are among us. Sorry watching the Americans as I write this awesometastic blog post. It is a bit late but still fully spectacular. I have some full comments and also some voracious squees.

• Even though the song wasn’t written about Harry Styles, I guess her doing her speech in the middle (still no idea why she does it live) was about him. 
• At first I agreed that “his indie records” were not cooler than yours, now I am with him. Shut it
• Instead of having writers make horrible jokes for you, they created a sweet speech about music. Good job LL Cool J. Though it was boring as fuck.
• I love the song A-Team but hearing it on the Grammys was the third time I heard it on Sunday. Sweet performance though.
• I am an avid user of twitter, but seriously quit it. You giving the tweets of ballsnatch27 and their love of Jay Z and Sting is boring. BORING. It doesn’t engage people to watch it either. Shut it down.
• So Adele won a Grammy for a live album of a song that was nominated for a Grammy last year? That isn’t shady at all. Totally not a slap in the face to people who actually wrote music.
• Fun are fun. Fact. Also Nate Ruess had a bit of the One Direction hair.
• John Mayer raided and dressed at the thrift store for his outfit.
• I want to bury myself in Miranda Lambert’s thighs. No wonder Blake Shelton is so happy all the time.
• Miguel sings super pretty. Like super awesome
• Wiz Khalifa has time for a tailored suit but not enough time for a shirt.
• Justin Timberlake was awesome. Yes he is taking a bit from the Robin Thicke bible but I am in for it all.
• Johnny Depp is trying hard to win the Indian hobo of the year.
• All of these dudes are holding their guitars up higher than I am comfortable. I am calling it the ReverseBillieJoe
• Do some of these people with crazy outfits organize them by type in their closet? You know the Village People section (crazy owl indian, robocop, glitter construction worker), Religious section, etc?  I am looking at you Dr. John
• Black Keys with Dr. John and the Preservation Hall Jazz band was one of the best performances.
• Kelly Clarkson, you aren’t skinny like other bitches but you don’t need to wear a velvet sack with a gold ribbon.
• T Swift really likes to show us she knows all of these songs. It isn’t annoying at all.
• Everyone is singing this Bruno Mars song because it is played everywhere and often. I like the song but how many times can you be locked out of heaven?
• Janelle Monae looks like a matador 85% of the times I see her?
• I just learned that Sting plays bass.
• The weak-ass but good Bob Marley tribute (aka- let’s see if we can see Rihanna’s undertit.
• Oh Drake if you are going to be that vapid when RihRih is on stage, then go back to the wheelchair.
• Did someone sharpie where Rihanna’s undertit would be?  UPDATE: that is a tattoo.
• Hunter Hayes is country. Did you all know this? He seemed like the person I would should know but I don’t. Now I know why.
• Jack White was amazing. He did look like an un-tailored matador  Is there an influx of Bulls in LA that I was not aware of?
• Katy Perry has boobs? Like a lot lot? How the fuck did I miss that?

  Me too Ellen.Me too.

• Poor Hunter, you sing like three lines from your Wanted song then are forced to introduce Carrie Undersnooze.
• We are going to light up your dress and put some images on it A) you can’t move B)it will start like we are drawing your ovaries, but I swear it will be something wicked cool at the end.
• I have a dysfunctional family song what is the best thing for it? Pretty images on a dress!!!!! MAKE IT SO
• Best performance of the evening was the Levon Helm tribute with the Weight. One of my most favorite songs and everyone rocked it. Especially the Alabama Shakes ladyfriend. She was amazing.
• I like Frank Ocean and I want to like that performance but no.
• Juanes won me over with his accent-laden version of Your Song.
• PRINCE!!!!
  

Americans update-nothing says “fuck me gently” like throwing a body into the river.

Overall the show was good. None of the performances were fantastical. The one thing the Grammy’s does well is collaborations between artists. Those were by far the best of the show.

Also the Americans is a good spy show and I recommend you all watching.